I need to buy a car. I need to study for the GRE. I need to plan for the summer. I have a lot of things that I need to do, but am I doing any of them? I’d probably say yes...and no. Eventually, I’ll do all of these things; it’s just a matter of when. Over the past few months, I’ve come to a particularly terrible realization about myself. I like to wait… and wait...and wait some more. I believe that there will be a time when everything is neatly lined up and I can do what I need to do. But that time never comes.
For example, buying a car, which by the way I still have not done. The first step in getting a car for me was learning to drive, it took me months to do that. Each day that went without a lesson, I had an excuse to explain why. I was either too busy, didn’t have the money or something came up. Once I had my lessons, I had to take the driving test and once again excuses galore. So it’s no surprise that 2 months after I’d passed my driving test, living in a state where having a car is a must, I still have not purchased or leased a car. This need to wait extends to other areas of my life, no doubt.
There are things I know I must do and I wait months to even attempt. I like to ensure that I am at the absolute perfect place in my life to even get started. Sometimes waiting means missed opportunities. So being the introspective, reflective person that I am, I ask myself why do I put myself in such positions.
A lot of this need to wait is rooted in fear. There is a constant fear of “what if I screw up.” What if there is something more, better suited for me, a better time. All of these things subconsciously has been affecting my ability to commit and act on things. I’m sure I’m not the only person with these issues. Fear can be absolutely crippling and keep us from living our lives to the fullest. The fear of failure is big and ever present. It’s that same fear that’s kept me from opening the GRE book I’ve had since September, it’s that fear that kept me from my driving test and it’s the same fear that holds me back from buying that car. What if I screw it up somehow? What do I do if I succeed?
So, how do I get a handle on my fear and live? Sometimes I do and sometimes I don’t. It’s become a matter of necessity for me. Am I willing to accept my life if I never take the GRE and see what’s possible for myself? I can honestly say for me I could not. Am I okay with not being able to live my life as I want due to not having a license? Again, that’s not something I could accept for myself. It might have taken months for me to get that point but eventually I do. Fear will always be there. It’s how we handle our fears that determines our paths. For some like myself, it takes months or even years. Sometimes we never overcome it and look back with regret. By acknowledging the impact of fear in my life, I’d like to believe I’m positioning myself in a place to better handle it. The first step is to admit I have a problem. What problems are you allowing to persist because of fear?
Pop Psyc Contribution by FearOfFlying
For example, buying a car, which by the way I still have not done. The first step in getting a car for me was learning to drive, it took me months to do that. Each day that went without a lesson, I had an excuse to explain why. I was either too busy, didn’t have the money or something came up. Once I had my lessons, I had to take the driving test and once again excuses galore. So it’s no surprise that 2 months after I’d passed my driving test, living in a state where having a car is a must, I still have not purchased or leased a car. This need to wait extends to other areas of my life, no doubt.
There are things I know I must do and I wait months to even attempt. I like to ensure that I am at the absolute perfect place in my life to even get started. Sometimes waiting means missed opportunities. So being the introspective, reflective person that I am, I ask myself why do I put myself in such positions.
A lot of this need to wait is rooted in fear. There is a constant fear of “what if I screw up.” What if there is something more, better suited for me, a better time. All of these things subconsciously has been affecting my ability to commit and act on things. I’m sure I’m not the only person with these issues. Fear can be absolutely crippling and keep us from living our lives to the fullest. The fear of failure is big and ever present. It’s that same fear that’s kept me from opening the GRE book I’ve had since September, it’s that fear that kept me from my driving test and it’s the same fear that holds me back from buying that car. What if I screw it up somehow? What do I do if I succeed?
So, how do I get a handle on my fear and live? Sometimes I do and sometimes I don’t. It’s become a matter of necessity for me. Am I willing to accept my life if I never take the GRE and see what’s possible for myself? I can honestly say for me I could not. Am I okay with not being able to live my life as I want due to not having a license? Again, that’s not something I could accept for myself. It might have taken months for me to get that point but eventually I do. Fear will always be there. It’s how we handle our fears that determines our paths. For some like myself, it takes months or even years. Sometimes we never overcome it and look back with regret. By acknowledging the impact of fear in my life, I’d like to believe I’m positioning myself in a place to better handle it. The first step is to admit I have a problem. What problems are you allowing to persist because of fear?
Pop Psyc Contribution by FearOfFlying